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Sometimes I wear my pink tie to a mediation.

October 13, 2011

My tie is not a drink (get it?); in fact I don’t like Mai Tais much at all. I like scotch.  But I digress.

My tie is pink.  When I think of my pink tie, I think of my mother.  She always talked about “Pink Tights.”  Irreverently but fondly, that’s how she referred to Rabbi Pinchas Teitz, ZT”L (may the memory of the righteous be for a blessing).  He officiated at my parents’ wedding in Elizabeth NJ long ago.  But I digress again.

My pink tie is from Thailand.  It is my Thai tie.  Here’s where I stop fooling around about it, however.

My pink silk tie was given to me by a group of 57 judges from Thailand. They were visiting Southern California in 2009 to learn about mediation.  As a part of their junket, they toured the Los Angeles Superior Court.  As a part of that tour, I was pleased to address them about mediation at the court.

As a thank you, one of the judges on behalf of the group presented me with a gift box containing this beautiful tie.  I appreciatively accepted it at the time and opened the gift box later, which apparently was the right move culturally.  After considering whether I could actually keep it, and getting the OK from court personnel, I took it home.  Really, there was no other choice without insulting the Court’s guests from Thailand.

The label on the back of the tie identifies it as being from the Court of Justice of Thailand.  The Court’s emblem is embroidered on the face of it.  It’s a bright hue and pink is not my color, but it is really a very nice tie.

Sometimes I wear my pink tie to mediations.   I have seen that color being worn by the weatherman on TV.  It must be all right.

But there are some real reasons I wear it:

1.    More important:  It gives me something to chat about while I am developing rapport with the participants in the mediation. If asked, I like to tell them the story of how I got it.

2.    Also important: The color pink may have meaning to some and the tie may have a subtle influence.  (From http://www.sailorastera.com/articles/3.html:  “This soft color overcomes evil, represents honor, love, morality, friendship, and general success.  Fidelity, honor, harmony, compassion and faithfulness are all traits of pink. [¶] In Hindu belief, pink is also a color associated with the heart chakra.  Harmony, forgiveness, healing, compassion, understanding, personal transformation, warmth, sharing, and devotion are all linked to pink; however, selflessness may also be attributed to the color.” (This might be stretching but these might be good “vibes” for a mediation; at least I have thought about it.)

3.    Less important: As I begin, maybe the tie invokes trust me in me as the mediator because I spoke about mediation to the court’s honored judicial guests.

Ultimately, I just like to wear the tie.  It’s different for me, and it often yields an opportunity for surprising conversation.  And I like that.

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